Okay I’m Callie Ludwick. I’m 18. I’m from Mentor, Ohio and my main addiction was alcohol.
I had my first drink when I was 14 or 15 and I remember, as soon as it hit me, I was like, “What is this–this is the best thing I’ve ever tried.” And since then I was binge drinking anytime I could, anytime.
34.1 percent of 15-year-olds report that they have had at least 1 drink in their lives (NSDUH)
My breaking point was probably after my boyfriend died of heroin overdose. And the day after his funeral, I planned my suicide. My mom, being the mother she is, she saw it right away. She saw that–’cause we–in our family, there’s a heavy, heavy, heavy line of addicts and she just saw it in my eyes and she just kind of knew.
4,358 people under age 21 die each year from alcohol-related car crashes, homicides, suicides, alcohol poisoning, and other injuries (NIH)
Me and my addiction–I’m a great manipulator and a great liar and I’ll hide anything from you–I’ll do whatever it takes. And I was good at it–I was very, very good at what I did. So she didn’t know the extent of it.
Nearly 88,000 people die from alcohol-related causes annually, making alcohol the fourth leading preventable cause of death in the United States (NIH)
Don’t let anyone belittle your addiction, because what you’re feeling is very, very real, and it’s scary, and your feelings are valid. A lot of people will try to tell you, “Well you’re not that bad of an addict–you’re not that bad of an alcoholic.” And, you know, that kind of messes with your mind a little bit, and that’s just not true–It’s not. So don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do this ’cause you can.